We recently hired a foreign corespondent to cover firearms that can be difficult to get in the United States, like the fully automatic AK-pattern rifle seen here:
"The trigger on this Soviet-era rifle was rather gritty, but I was still able to repel a squad-size element of Congolese rebels," said Shooting Illustrated Foreign Corespondent Alistar C. Panzee. "Despite lacking truly opposable thumbs, I was able to direct fire into the ground so as to avoid unnecessary casualties, though I recognize I was violating several rules of gun safety. One cannot predict one's reaction in a self-defense scenario, and I completely forgot my training at Zoosite."
"We are delighted to welcome Alistar to the Shooting Illustrated family," said Editor in Chief Guy J. Sagi. "We look forward to his regular reports from all over the world as he tests guns to which we often lack access owing to import restrictions. Alistar is a superlative example of how Shooting Illustrated continues to attract the field's top experts."
Look for a full review of the gun from Panzee at ShootingIllustrated.com in the near future, after he receives payment in the form of bananas.
*According to industry insiders, Panzee was a consultant for the remade version of "Planet of the Apes," making his expertise unindictable. As you can see from the end of his report, he also recently auditioned for a role in the upcoming remake of "Red Dawn."